Archive for the ‘Cruel World’ Category

I consider myself pretty mature.  I don’t really think of myself as naive or wide-eyed with childlike wonder.  But every once in a while, something reminds me that the world is an awful, dark, and terrible place. Suppose there is a scale of this sort of event.  One would constitute a minor discomfort-inducing revelation, like that your aging parents still have sex, and Ten is a life-shaking crisis that leaves me changed, shaken, and questioning all of life’s basic assumptions.

For example, on the low end of the scale, a couple of weeks ago, I was on my way to work enjoying my in-car entertainment of choice: an audiobook.  In this case, Shanghai Girls by Lisa See.  This book is pretty dark in general, a veritable litany of suffering.  But in the first quarter, there is a graphic rape scene that lasted pretty much my whole drive.  Talk about a shitty way to start your day.  It’s 8am and I’m already bitter at the powerlessness of women in society, angry at men in general, and pretty much ready to take it out on the next man that looks at me funny.  Suck, right?  So, that would be like a 2 or a 3 on the scale of Naivete-Destroying Badness.

Then, today, I learned about the existence of that which I was previously, blissfully unaware.  I miss the world I used to inhabit, where such things did not exist, even in abstract thought.  You just don’t know what you’ve got til it’s gone.



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